Meet My Old Friend, Anxiety
May 6, 2010 at 11:54 am 2 comments
As a teenager, or even in our twenties, we think we know who we are. We think we have it all figured out and know truly who we are as a person. Then we get older. As the years go by, we look back at our younger selves and think, “Wow, I was clueless”
Looking back, I see how much I have grown as a woman. Not only physically but mentally and emotionally. I am a completely different person now than I was 20 years ago, 10 years ago…hey even 5 years ago. I see a different woman standing in the mirror now, one with a little more ‘character’ in the face and a little more patience.
Even though I am a different person than I was years ago, there are definitely still parts of me that are very much the same. As hard as I try to get rid of them, they stubbornly remain. Here I am, in my thirties, still learning how to deal with them.
One being, Anxiety.
Now that I think about it, I was a pretty anxious kid. I remember having stomach aches all the time and always worrying about something, whether it was some school event or homework assignment. It wasn’t much better in high school, although it did become more manageable during college.
I still struggle with anxiety, every now and then. When my daily stressors finally become overwhelming, I will get the feeling like my heart is about to explode or race out of my chest. I’ve learned after a couple of trips to the ER that is most likely not a heart attack, just my old friend Anxiety saying hello.
Well, my dear old friend sure got the best of me today.
Today was my very first phone interview for a prospective job, ever. Since I basically fell into my current career after taking a temp job right out of college, I’ve never had to submit a resume or interview for a job. I was very excited to learn they wanted to speak with me, especially since I am passionate about their product and philosophy. Unfortunately, my excitement quickly turned to nervousness and anxiety as the phone call continued. I really wanted the job and became way too self-conscious about every little word coming out of my mouth. I am hoping they invite me to the second round of interviews, since I don’t think my old friend Anxiety helped me make the best first impression today.
I’m trying to stay positive…
Thanks a lot, pal.
Entry filed under: Getting Old. Tags: daily life, my 30's, work.
1.
Stacy, with no E | May 10, 2010 at 1:08 pm
Nobody, and I mean nobody has as bad luck as I when it comes to anxiety attacks. Sure, my sister once fainted on the train and woke up on a stretcher, but picture me … on the 50th floor of a fancy-shcmancy office interviewing for a position I wanted ever so bad, third or fourth interview in as many weeks, and when they asked me question #1, like right after hello, I BLANKED. Forgot who they were, where I was, what we were doing, how to talk, how the helll I was. Lasted a great 2 minutes. After a glass or water and appologies out the butt, the interview was done and I never heard from them again. TRUST ME, this crap doesn’t happen to anyone but ME, lol. You will be fine.
2.
Single Soccer Mom | May 10, 2010 at 10:16 pm
Lol! Isn’t that the worst? I’ve actually had that happen before, except mine was on question #3 and was being videotaped! There’s nothing like the other person’s reaction after you completely blank and forget everything smack dab in the middle of a conversation. I love how you describe it…forgetting who they were, where you were, what you were doing and how to talk! That’s exactly what it is! It’s as if someone quickly erases every last detail from your memory and drops you into some strange situation…Uhhh, where am I, what am I doing?
Thanks for sharing your story Stacy and for the support! 